I got into an argument online last year with a ‘recovering’ Alcoholic.
Now, I struggled with Alcohol and ‘social’ party drugs in a past life, and I honestly believe myself to be free of them… and there are acute reasons as to why, in my opinion.
This argument stemmed from the logic of an ‘Anonymous’ group for drinkers and how once an ‘addict’, always an ‘addict’.
This particular group I was forced into attending at one point, via an intervention by all of the members of my household at the time. It was a ‘go to this group each week or we are kicking you out‘ type thing.
I only lasted the one meeting.
Lo and behold, I was also kicked out of the house too… eventually.
So, what was this argument about?
I don’t know if you have met anyone who has been through the mantra of the ‘Anonymous’ groups, but they often have a mindset of ‘keeping up the struggle’, and ‘each day as it comes’. The ‘always an addict’ philosophy, may well be true in many cases, but that mindset and perspective can not, and will not ever set you free.
To me, you are setting yourself up to be a slave of something you believe to be outside of yourself; that you have no control over. You are treating it like a jacket you can never take off, so are not conceptually open to the idea of running around topless in your truest form; it isn’t even a possibility.
I was trying to explain this to the girl online, but she was so proud of the patch on her jacket that showed she was being a trooper everyday, in her personal struggle towards sobriety, that she felt I was attacking her identity.
Which I was, in all honesty.
By tallying up the run of sober days each morning you are never going to ‘let go’ of who you once were and move into something new. You will keep your mind running the same ‘addiction’ script into perpetuity.
In all fairness, her sober days were running in the multi 100’s, so on a level she was succeeding, for which I congratulated her. But with that kind of tally, you are in the zone where you can free yourself totally, by changing your self identity to something else.
You could be a runner, a coder, even just a healthy person, a chef, whatever you like. Just not a ‘recovering alcoholic’.
Relegate that mode of operation to ‘a past life’, when the time is ready.
Take the jacket off once physical dependence has wained, as the rest is in your head.
Let it go…
This isn’t just applicable to Alcohol and Drugs, but to all demons that lurk in each of us.